Just got done with a super awesome national rocketry competition which was, in reality, not that awesome.

HOWEVER.



I built this bitchin' X-Wing model. It flies, people. IT FLIES LIKE THIS.



Yes, that's right. It flies and explodes mere feet from the ground. It was very sad.

However, I rebuilt the broken parts after that catastrophic failure ("cato") and then, miraculously, it flew. Well. As in, relatively straight up, then deployed the parachute and came down soft and smooth. Although I have no photographic evidence of this.

In other news, I have now been beat in the national rankings by all of my three siblings. This year, it was my youngest sister. Uh, I'm not bitter.

The stress is getting to me. Or something. It makes for amusing stories, however, like yesterday when my sister was testing her model rocket design using a HUGE badass engine.

I, however, was on the phone, whining to the support guy that they'd sent me the wrong technology.

ME: Tab A definitely doesn't fit into slot B.
SUPPORT GUY: I think maybe you're doing it wrong.
ME: I'm pretty sure I know how to put a cable into a port. It doesn't fit.
SUPPORT GUY: Well, uh, did you know there's a secret cable? Yeah, just take the adapter off the end.
ME: Oh, hay, I think that'll fit.
ME: Give me a sec to make sure this works.
MY SISTER'S HUGE BADASS ENGINE: *explodes loudly*
ME: ...
ME: OK, I'm good. Bye!

And also, of course, there was the fun awesomeness of my parents' air conditioning being completely out, causing everyone to blob around in a sluggish "I'm melting" sort of way. This prompted my parents to take us out for dinner "to somewhere air conditioned, I don't care where." We ended up at Red Lobster, where I got a suspiciously alcoholic alcoholic-looking beverage that turned out to be a pink slurpee.

And then I went home and the power was out, because I'd apparently hacked into a SECRET BONUS LEVEL of not getting ANY air conditioning at all. Or light.

And that was without using any cheat codes, people.

An inane post.

Fairly recently, I was diagnosed with depression. Yay. Needless to say, it sucks. And while it's made life in general a lot harder, it's made my creative life almost nonexistent. Before, I could almost always summon at least a little creative energy, whether it involved writing, sewing, photography, even doodling in my homework margins. In the past months, however, it's felt as though my fountain has been drying up. And what I've missed most is my writing.

There's a lot available on the internet about writing: getting your draft down, editing, and plenty of publishing information makes it onto my radar. I enjoy the reading, but only rarely does any of it actually encourage me to write. Often, it's a lot of pressure and discouragement, which goes hand in hand with the depression: I'm never going to be ready for publication, I'm never going to be good enough. How can I, when I don't have the strength to write? Writing has always been hard for me anyway; I love the stories, but putting them down is a lot more difficult. So when I see writers' comments about how they can't help but write, and how they put down 1000 words a day at least, it's discouraging in comparison. I consider the day a success, right now, if I can write two mostly coherent sentences of fiction. (Blog posts like this, or journal entries, are not comparatively a big deal, because I experience almost no pressure for quality with either of those.)

I asked my watchers on Twitter for advice, on how to write when you can't write (and please no "just write!") I didn't get much response. My dad, though, pulled me aside a bit later. "The best way to do it is just put down three sentences. That's all. Don't worry about quality, or relevance, or continuity. Three sentences. And then go back tomorrow and work on them. And then write three more sentences." And it took me a few days, but I feel a little more capable of the craft now, after writing a few sentences, playing with a few ideas, finally finishing a good book. I might not be able to plunk down 1000 words or more a day, and I have the unfortunate capability to NOT write, but I'm making progress, little by little.

EDIT: this post was prompted by this post by Colin Rowsell on Writing and Depression. Followup here.

Some interesting, and rather humbling numbers.

The product of boredom. Recreated from a pair of ill-fitting boxers given to each female in my family. The new version fits a lot better and will get worn.

Before:



After: (no action shots, sorry)

Just a short post: we had to make pennants for our ROTC flights. My flight is Oscar, so we decided we would be the Ospreys. Here's the pennant:



(I ironed it after taking the picture.)

And Tigger, trying to help:

They don't go together.

So I've been fighting some sort of weird illness for the past three weeks or so, where the only symptoms are that I'm tired and I can't sleep. (Dr: Probably you're tired because you can't sleep. Me: ORLY?) And since I, like most people in the world, have obligations I must fulfill (for me, school and Air Force), creativity ends up by the wayside. Sometimes those obligations fall by the wayside too, but creativity goes first. Which is sad, because then I feel like I have nothing to look forward to. But it's difficult enough to concentrate on anything at all, that I have to devote my whole concentration to homework and class and the like.

I don't have a solution, unfortunately. Except for maybe, reduce stress and/or illness and the creativity will probably come back. And if I had an easy way to do that while maintaining the status quo, I'd be a kazillionaire. My method right now involves sleeping pills and a doctor, as well as prioritizing. The prioritizing can help with the stress even if you're not ill. ...

Aaand I thought I had more to say, and I thought that what I had to say was more worthwhile, but it's not. So I'll stop here.

But feel free to offer any advice in the comments!

A thousand words is a short film by Ted Chung telling the fleeting moments people share without being aware of it. Beautiful.


A Thousand Words from Ted Chung on Vimeo.

The underskirt featured (but not really visible) in my kanji skirt tutorial, pictured more clearly here:



It ended up being WAY more floofy than I expected (which was silly of me, considering how much fabric this uses.) It's made of relatively inexpensive cotton broadcloth, which is not so high in quality, and also not so much of a concern since it's primarily an underskirt. But it could be worn on its own as well. (Oh, and the ribbon peeking over the waistband is not part of the skirt.)

( Tutorial here! )

Sorry there's not many pictures—it's a lot of fabric to work with, which made it obnoxious to try and photograph the essential parts, but the sewing itself is really simple, all straight lines on rectangles. If you have any questions, ask away!

I recently completed this ruffled, high-waisted black and red kanji bustle skirt:




It ended up being more complicated than I expected, and often more frustrating, but it fits me perfectly and is totally worth it. There is a matching top, not pictured (full outfit pictures coming when I get the remaining bits and pieces.) The style is a Japanese fashion called 'lolita' (which has nothing to do with Nabokov's book about the pedophile—the style focuses on Victorian influences, fluff, ruffles, lace, etc.) Those of you who know me might think this is odd, since I almost always wear jeans and a t-shirt; mostly I just like to look at and make the pretty clothes I always admire, but I'll try to get some use of this in.

This tutorial is just a documentation of how I made this skirt; it's certainly not the only way and probably not the best way. I'm not the most experienced sewer; this is as much for my benefit as anyone else's, so I can see my process.

( Click for tutorial )

Next tutorial: fluffy underskirt.

Whilst I finish my ruffled skirt and related items, I'll post my zebra projects. No tutorial, although I made the hoodie based on this tutorial. The zebra fleece came from Joann.com, and I love it (it's warm, not to mention easy to work with!) The hoodie took me about four hours, off and on, and the hat took about half an hour.

( Click for pics! )

I still have some zebra fleece left over (I already made a pillow with it) so I'm still looking for ideas for what to do with it. Although there's not very much left anymore.

:)

The old journal is gone. Nobody really read it, I rarely posted, and I got bored with it. The new journal is here, featuring far more interesting content. This content may include (but is not limited to) book reviews, sewing tutorials and pictures, thoughts on revising my sci-fi novel, fashion photography, cool links, and musings on life.

Coming up soon: a sewing tutorial for a ruffled skirt, and ramblings on character names and retro-worldbuilding.